Judee Sill (1971)

Man, I fucking miss sleep. I picked up this overnight gig at a liquor store downtown, this plus the Exchange gives me roughly seventy to eighty hours a week, plus the fifteen to twenty from Ink Spot and the six or so from the Art Institute. My credit card remains untouched, which is damn awesome, but I'm only scratching in about five hours of sleep a day, and normally as naps between shifts rather than all in one go. I've started just carrying around a thermos of coffee and swigging at will.

The jobs are cool though. The Exchange is real slow from a selling point of view, but strong on a buying one. Everyone's been getting rid of the crap they got for Christmas that they didn't really want, or already had, or never wound up giving away, as well as trying to recover financially. We've been getting some pretty stellar titles sliding through the doors, and most of them are in good condition too. I almost feel bad for most of the kids selling them, you can tell when it's come down to their fanclub-issue-only first press Beatles singles and eating. I pay them well though, so they can't really complain. Those things make us a mint online.

The nice thing about the Spot is that business never really changes, seeing as body modification is such a big deal, financially and personally. People usually plan ahead, and for a lot of ink work, need to save a lot before hand before they can start getting the work done. A lot of thought goes into the images that get picked and a lot of cash goes into the execution. It's comforting to know exactly what to expect every time you step through those doors. Yeah, the people themselves are all different and unique and interesting, but they're all fundamentally the same and the pace never changes.

Graveyard shifts are fucking brutal though, especially when booze is involved. The pay's pretty phenomenal for how little I actually need to work, I'm willing to bet that it's to compensate for the drunken assholes and washed up junkies that troll through at all hours. You really need nerves of steel to deal with them. There've been a few times where even I've almost flinched. On the upside, momentary weakness only strengthens my resolve to harden up in the long run.

Work in the studios is the only real break I have, I just need to stand around and not move. The trick is managing to stay awake despite the fact that you have no stimulation, mental or physical, whatsoever. All there is to focus on is the growing strain in over-extended muscles after keeping them in an extreme for a twenty-minute pose. I suppose that focusing on the spreading cramps and pains is kinda masochistic, but it keeps me from passing out so I suppose I can compromise on it.

Other than work, life stays pretty much the same. I haven't physically seen my brothers in about a month, and if it weren't for the occasional note on the fridge about something needed from the grocery store and the steadily depleting food supply, I'd start to think they'd moved out without telling me. I almost half think that anyway, they're just swinging by to eat here because it's free.



I've managed to half most of my expenses without needing to compromise on my allowance for the boys. I didn't buy a bus pass this month, which means I need to factor in more commute time for walking between jobs and home but it's manageable. I've also stopped going to coffee shops. As much as I hate that Folger's crap, the giant tins are less than ten bucks and keep me caffeinated for the month. I don't even get a buzz from coffee anymore, my eyes just get a little dried out so they're harder to close. Guess I'm getting immune. Rice has become the main staple of my diet, it's cheap and filling and brown rice has a lot of vitamins so I'm not as likely to die of malnutrition. I have been starting to lose weight though, I need to get something cheap and fatty into my diet to counteract. Despite popular belief, exposed ribs is not attractive on anyone, least of all a woman. Giant M&M bags should start doing the trick and provide good snacks while working.

So far, I'm managing ok. I'm just making it financially, no need to dig myself further into debt yet. I'm even making full payments to the bank which I was afraid I wouldn't manage to do. I swear to fucking God, if my father wasn't already dead, I'd kill him for giving that fucking asshole any kind of right to touch our money. I'm still fighting to get it sorted out, years after the fact. One day I'll have the satisfaction of bashing his face in. Life would be too cruel to not cough up that opportunity eventually.